“Maybe We Should Have Never Met”

 

Maybe we should have never met or else we wouldn’t have a choice but to say goodbye to each other.

Maybe we should have never met because our relationship is very much over.

Maybe I should have never approached you because you looked all alone.

Maybe I should have ignored you from the start.

Maybe I should have never come by to where you were the day we met.

Maybe I should have not parted with a friend which led me to meet you.

Maybe we should have never have spent personal time together.

Maybe we should not have discussed what we want in a significant other, which is the same thing.

Maybe I should have never done anything for you from the start.

 

It’s my fault that I fell in love with you.

It’s my fault that I couldn’t control my heart.

It’s my fault that I even met you from the start.

It’s my fault that I requested more from you when you didn’t even bother to offer from your own heart.

It’s my fault that you’ve pushed yourself away.

It’s my fault that it’s over this way.

 

You never said you liked me more than a friend.

You let something eat you up inside without telling anyone.

You kept secrets from me only to be caught in the lies.

You never did anything for me, which should have been a sign.

You always complained about paying for the tab whenever we went out.

You were NEVER there for me when I needed you.

You always lied about how you were spending your time aside from work.

You proved that in the end, you’re also another jerk.

You have lashed out at me twice amongst others due to jealousy.

You can’t exclaimed why everything got messy.

You keep telling me that you need space and time to think.

You kept lying as time started to shrink.

 

I tried my best to be a friend.

I tried to include you amongst my real friends.

I tried to help you with your hair and get better clothes.

I tried my best to always give you space.

I tried my best to keep up the pace.

I am trying to get over you the best way I can.

I am not going to look for another man.

I don’t know why right now my heart chose you to love.

I don’t know how I can cope when push goes to shove.

 

When I look back at the good times, maybe we should have never met.

When I recall the bad times, maybe we should have never met.

When I reflect on the times we spent together, maybe we should have never met.

When I am remembered by how we met, maybe we should have never met.

 

If I hadn’t met you, my heart wouldn’t be in love.

If I hadn’t met you, my heart would not have felt love

If I hadn’t met you, part of me wouldn’t have had that special kind of bliss.

If I hadn’t met you, we wouldn’t come to the end of all this.

 

I regret that I love you.

I regret that I had did anything for you.

I regret that we met.

I regret all the personal time we spent.

I regret that I allowed myself to care for you.

I regret everything I have said to you.

I regret everything about us.

I regret what we didn’t discuss.

I regret that we can’t make an amend.

I regret that sadly this comes to an end.

 

 

 

 

 

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“Security and Shopping”

As it’s that time of year, when there are sales online and in stores all over the world especially in America. People are thinking that they are getting a good deal for whatever it might be, but is the good deal worth the pain and struggle of an actual sale? The real truth, how safe is your banking information when it’s used online or in a store since so many people would rather pay with a debit or credit card over cash? In recent time, so many renowned stores have had their information systems hacked into causing an uproar for their customers who have a credit card for those specific vendors. As many other people have called it, “it’s a cashless society” and it became that way for most persons due to convenience (I rarely carry cash since it’s easier to get robbed). Another factor to consider, is that most people are traveling more internationally, so it’s easier to carry a credit card verses another country’s currency which they don’t understand how it’s used.

Is all the hype of holiday shopping even worth it? Personally, it’s not, it’s more of a headache! What was originally for the purpose to get gifts for Chanukah and Christmas, has become something that resulted in a less religious connotation. The month of December has become known as the “Holiday” season, yet, the people who are buying up so much don’t even identify as a Christian or Jew, they’re mostly from other religious backgrounds or atheists. Does this make sense? No, it doesn’t! The end of year was meant to be a time of love to spend with family and friends, rather it’s resulted in selfishness and “hate”. Sales clerks in stores are forced to be happy when they’re miserable as they deal with rude and disrespectful customers. Customer service that have to deal with online orders, have to endure the pain of staying at work from very early morning until very late in the evening as they agonize in dealing with moronic customers regarding their unsatisfied online purchases. So the people who have to work in retail whether for online or in-store, do they even get to spend time with their family and friends? NOPE, they have to deal with cranky people!

At the end of the year, it’s a hacker’s dream to get ahold of random peoples banking information from the purchases of major retailers. Whether they actually use a person’s personal info, can vary. Most hackers are just a bunch of bored socially awkward millennial men and women. Most hackers are not housebound as depicted villains in television shows and movies, they’re actually casually passing by anywhere you go and they use public Wi-Fi internet access for their laptop since they’re always on the go and don’t want to be traced. Most of these hackers prefer to use a MacBook over a Windows type of computer operating system.

So what’s the purpose to get a strangers personal information? The use of a debit and credit card, can just about always be traced when and where it was used whether online or in-store. Television and movies suggest that a person’s banking information will be used to send money to offshore accounts anonymously when in truth, even that can be traced since no account can’t be created without a person’s personal information too. The sad part is that, once a debit or credit card has been used to make a purchase somewhere, the funds are gone and getting refunded, is still difficult to prove especially for retail stores that are pushing out hundreds of transactions per hour where tracking security cameras can take some time.

The general public doesn’t know how this all works, they’re not involved in working with security and in tech companies. They’re scared by what the news puts out with the result for the more older crowd to start carrying more cash again which makes them a target for thieves to easily rob them since cash is untraceable. The more cash people are going to be carrying, the more they’re victims to robbers. Robbers aren’t just thug black men, they come in all races and genders. Hackers are predominately white and Asians.

So is it really extremely important to make excess purchases for the end of the year? Not really, unless it involves in the desperate need to make a business write off so that a company doesn’t have to pay a lot in taxes for the following year! Is it really any cheaper to make the purchases of electronics, apparel, and home goods during the renowned holiday season? Nope! Is your banking information safe? Sort of. It’s a person’s personal information that is more important and it’s easier to access from their banking info.

Holiday shopping is overrated, a headache, stressful, and whether to make in-store purchases or bid online, can be tiring. It’s not about a person’s financial security, it’s now about a person’s physical security that all of the shopping is taking a toll on. We are not safe from the altercations random strangers are harming each other with when it comes to in-store purchases. Some people have gone to extreme measures to go to the homes of people who are not home when their deliveries arrive and take their purchases made from online orders, plus it doesn’t help that most delivery services just leave boxes on or at doorsteps in certain communities. How secure is the security for retailers? It’s not their fault it’s not secured, it’s our fault for needing to make excess useless purchases!

“Success and Failures: Who Are Your True Friends?”

Whether a person is successful in life, there’s a time when MOST persons were struggling to the point they were homeless and not even family were willing to help. These people who suffered weren’t drunkards or drug addicts, they were just everyday people who hit hard times.

We will always who know our true friends are by the simple fact of whom helps us when we are struggling in life. Sadly, most people who claim to be a good friend refuse to be of any assistance and worse off, family will more likely disown us.

Honestly, in my lifetime so far, I’ve learned who my true friends are. They are the people who give me emotional support. I don’t currently need material support, but I have in the past and it was people who were more of a stranger to me who helped me and never family. The people who claimed to be a friend during those hard times and for some matters currently, they don’t call, text, email, and they definitely don’t even want to meet up. I understand that everyone has their own life, but even I have made time for others to be of some comfort. Life isn’t easy and everyone gets hit with tough and rough times, for some it’s more rigorous than others.

For some of the most successful business people in history as well as some of the best athletes that are underrated, they’ve gone through hard times. Many of those persons had suffered poverty and homelessness. Also, many of them suffered physical and emotional abuse by their parents or even their parental figures. For most of those persons, they never received any love at home, so they found love elsewhere, such as in sports or even a line of work that would be a well to do business today. There are many persons who chose to live a life where they would be obvious criminals due to the environment they were in. Many persons chose a greater path to benefit themselves. Most of the successful people don’t all have a clean criminal record, but they also didn’t commit excessive petty crimes.

Overall, it starts with what is in our hearts. I didn’t have “love” in my life growing up which is common with Asian families. I was never praised, always told I am a failure at everything. What helped me were the people I became friends with later that didn’t know my family, just me. Over a short period of time, they knew how to be of encouragement instead of a disappointment. From a young age, I was yearning for love since most of my schoolmates did have that in their life and I didn’t. I spent many years being naïve about “love” in friendships and romance, later to discover that I didn’t have role models to help guide me about who has good intentions and who doesn’t. What helped the most is moving away. I get to start over! I get to do what I want and when I wanted, with the need to finally be content with life. I spent most of my life feeling miserable, but all it took was smiling amidst suffering hard times that helped me along the way even more. I have great relationships with these certain people to this day even if life doesn’t allow us to see each other physically constantly.

So how do we amount to being successful or end up as a failure? It takes a person’s outlook on life. It also takes a person who’s aware of their surroundings, acknowledging the patterns of others, and choosing wisely for themselves. It’s very trial and error how and where we end up in life as adults. Many people have given up in becoming a successful professional athlete, musician, artist, actor, and business figure, while others have thrived even though they were also victims of insults and ridicule. Take notice, not everyone whose successful today had a good beginning in life.

“Us”

[Woman falls in love with a gay man]

I can’t believe that I fell in love with Peter. He wasn’t what I wanted but my heart chose him. As much as he has later become a bit of a jerk, my heart still loves him even though my brain does not. I can’t put too much of my problems as much as I would like since our friendship is still too early. For the time being, I will not know why my heart chose to fall in love with him of all persons in the world. The day or time that I finally realize how and why will be a mystery for a sometime.

Unlike most gays, Peter had always forced himself to be gay since he’s naïve to a lot of matters. He doesn’t have any heterosexual male friends. He doesn’t really engage in predominately heterosexual activities. He’s been yearning for a “husband”, instead he has to be the hubby! He’s not easy to get along with. He can be catty with people, especially with me since he now knows that I love him and can’t truthfully hate him in the end. Does he love me? That is where everything is very gray since he’s NEVER told a soul! He won’t even tell his so-called best friend who’s a female!

The few gay friends who have met him can tell that he does “like” me and even one of my friends said that he has a “girl crush” with me since he feels like he needs to compete for guys. He has done things to irritate me. I know he’s lied about spending time with “friends” when he’s actually on a date with a guy he met from dating apps. How do I know he has lied about it? People he doesn’t know have seen him out and about and without ever meeting him, they’ve described who the other person is, usually an Asian guy since he’s a rice queen! MOST other gay men aren’t into him. He has bad hygiene and zero style sense!

He seriously needs help with his hygiene and fashion! I’ve helped him with a more summer style but now he needs to don a more autumn and winter style. Plus, I even picked out almost all of his new underwear, boxer briefs.

I still don’t consider him attractive. It’s mainly due to his sour smell from his clothes that he doesn’t put in the dryer after washing them, but hangs in his room on a laundry rack. He finds the scents from new clothing and such to be repulsive where as my friend Luis and I, LOVEEEEE the smell of new things!

It’s painful that I’ve done more for him than he’s done for me. He assumes that being courteous is enough. He’s starting to let me get the only available seat on Muni while he stands on the very full and busy train. He has been very jealous when other males look at me sexually or just are more engaging. But at the same time, I can’t and shouldn’t put any more pressure of my problems onto him. Even my problems regarding family issues, it’s really none of his business since he and I aren’t a couple. Learning to love someone as a whole that my heart has chosen hasn’t been easy, but it’s also a learning process. Aside from my children who aren’t his and my mother, my heart is in love with Peter. He’s not perfect, he can’t physically sweep me off my feet, and we may never be intimate since he’s gay, but I love him.

“Sold, to the highest bidder”

You can one day own a business and then the following day you’re no longer the boss. It is taboo whether it is a smart move to sell a business while for some business owners it’s the sacrifice to be bought out to save themselves from further failure. Some of the greatest business transactions in history have proved an intelligent move while for others, it was purely a mistake to sell ones own company or for a larger company to purchase a smaller one only to result in getting demolished all together. 
So why are some companies selling their businesses? Did some business CEO’s and founders lose touch with their line of work? Was the change to save themselves from further failure? Was the transaction the best decision from both parties to gain greater success? 
The reasons are endless… So what are larger companies looking to purchase from smaller organizations or even large firms just like themselves? 
In many instances, many people are losing their own job due to the company CEO or founder selling to a higher calling. There is a financial crisis due to this issue. With the major tech scene booming in major cities across the globe, many of the “employees” work remotely in far out areas. Whether a company has only a few employees to those who employ thousands of men and women, many jobs are at stake when companies merge. Most persons have been with that only company ever since they finished university and when a merge takes place, most of the employees get displaced with the result of unemployment. Most persons don’t even know how to look for another job since they’ve only had that one. In certain industries, applying for a job to start all over again, is stressful. 
The majority of companies of various sizes, do not allow the public to know what they sold themselves for to another. They are modest of the sale by letting those who inquire that they can’t reveal such info for legal reasons! 
For some people, when they sell a business, they see it as a success because they know that they had created something worth while that larger business want to be in on. It will always be a mystery for why people subject their to be bought by a larger company. 
Some recent larger transaction were the companies BEATS to Apple, EMC to Dell, Hadoop is under Yahoo!, Oculus to Facebook, Lucas Arts to Disney, Wachovia to Wells Fargo, Washington Mutual to Chase, Bell South to AT&T, etc…

So what will be the future for the larger companies who bought out large companies such as themselves? All industries are affected by these multi-billion (dollars) transactions. The job positions of many managers as well as those on the lower end are in jeopardy. Only time will tell the true outcome.